Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Dang It's Bright out Here!

That's right people,
I am crawling out of my hole.
Not really because I want to (it's so comfy in there), but because some dear friends of mine have
kindly pointed out that it is time to get my act together with this blog, and frankly, life.
I haven't written for quite a while, because I will be honest (thanks for giving me permission tricia) 
I. am. struggling.
There, I said it.
For all the blog world to see.
(or just the people who happen to read this)

I would say that I am WAY behind...but I really am not, because I have hardly taken a picture since we moved here.
 I have had 2 kids start school, a girl potty training, moved into a house, been boating, played at parks, and went hiking to Dixie Rock...and not a photo to prove it...
which really sorta proves my slump.
Apparently, my camera and "situational depression" just don't belong together :)

I feel so guilty for feeling this way too.
I mean, I got a pretty darn good life.
We have health, happiness, love,
plus the new season of parenthood just started (can I get a woot woot??)
but I have come to realize that change is hard for me. So very hard.
I am homesick and feeling a little lost at times.
I am going to pull out of it though, I promise.
And this blog is going to help me do it.
So if you are reading, Thank you. You are a true friend.
If you're not, then good, you won't see how ungrateful I am being and I won't be embarrassed the next time I see you.
Okay, enough babble...

::An Update::
(totally forced everyone out of the dark house and made us get 1 family pic on Sonny's lunch break)

The New Home::It's big. We moved into an older hood. There are seriously no kids here which definitely has it's pluses and minuses. I love that my kids depend more on each other as playmates, but oh how we miss the tiny little knocks all day long! We are adjusting to much quieter days. The house is about 45 years old. It is open, hard to clean, and Rockstar and Gretta's room has some awesome vintage (not in the good way) wall paper. It is dark. Not sure why, because there are a ton of windows. I realize just how dark it is every time that I go outside and nearly get blinded with the daylight. It disorients me every time...kind of reminds me of my younger years when I stayed in my basement for 2 days straight playing Donkey Kong. I ate 3 entire packs of fig newtons and when I finally came upstairs after beating the game, I was like "What?? Life is going on out here??" whoa. sorry, tangent there. K back to the house...It has tons of storage and spiders, and there are things we like and hate, but it's okay. We are making it a home and it is starting to feel a little more like that every day. 
Oh and the yard is AWESOME and the reason we chose this house to rent. We have a treehouse, swings, basket ball hoops, and a splash pad that works on and off. It really is a dream yard. (see, I can be positive!)

Lulu::Started school the day we moved here. She is in the 1st grade!! I know. What!!??? She adores school and she keeps me on my toes "mom, you HAVE to sign this tonight!" Ha. She is totally the responsible one of the bunch. She has a great teacher! Grammy got her into her same school, so it gives me so much comfort that she has someone there to rescue her if needs be. Lulu has also met some darling friends and I couldn't be more grateful for that. She has also found a passion in tumbling and goes to a great place every thursday to work on her back bends and round offs. I think her cheerleading dreams just may come true :) Lu is such happy girl and adjusts so well. We are so lucky to have her as a little leader for the family. Geesh. I am getting teary. Love that girl.

Rockstar::Had a rough go in the beginning and it really is all our fault. His life drastically changed when we moved here. Like, I said there are no kids around and with Lu gone all day, his days were long and hard. We started him out in a preschool 3 x a week. Every time, we dropped him off, I felt a little sick to my stomach. He was surrounded with 3 year olds, and we started to wonder if we had made the right decision in holding him back, so a few weeks ago we looked into starting him in kindergarten. It took some angels pulling some strings, but we got him in (a month late!) and it really has been such a good decision! He has been thriving ever since. I adore his teacher. She is just perfect for him. So grateful! We are going to see how the year goes and decide if we will have him repeat kindergarten or not. He hangs with Erberto and some boy "with a cool mohawk" which has made the Rockstar convinced that he needs some spiky hair! (yikes) He is patiently waiting to start up karate (totally stalling that one). Ha. Oh and he makes paper rockets all day long that resemble male body parts and puts them in envelopes to send to his friends. I don't though, because the resemblance is just uncanny. really. haha. eww. sorry for the image :)

Gigi::Oh this girl! She keeps us on our toes! I trip over her all day long, and I love and hate it. She is just too cute. With just us at home, we are two peas in a pod. It has been so fun playing baby dolls and going on shopping trips together. She has become a horrible eater. Only gogurts and string cheese and it is driving me bonkers! She loves Dora! Not all episodes just 3...baby dora, racing dora, and gymnastics dora...and she watches them over and over again. We go to a music preschool every wednesday with some other moms. She also started potty training last weekend. It started out AMAZING and I really considered writing a book about how to potty train effectively and efficiently. ha! And then that little angel upstairs that keeps me humble changed things up and the whole potty training has gone to crap. literally. Augh! SO hard!!!! Are there any potty trainers for hire out there? Anyone???

Sonny::Has been working a ton and mountain biking as much as he can. Okay, Seriously this is starting to sound like a Christmas card huh? Geesh, I don't even know what else to say about the man either...

Me::Umm...I watch a lot of TV and shop on ebay??
Sorry, it is all I got. I think I will start up yoga soon though :)

It has been an adjustment for all of us. Gigi asks on a daily basis "When are we going home to our purple house?" It is hard to think, never. But then again, Change can be exciting right. right?
I know that right now we are just in the transition phase and it takes a while to get a "new normal"
but I know it will come.
And in the mean time
we have health, happiness, love, and 
a new episode of parenthood on the dvr :)
xoxo

*this post took me approximately 4 hours to write. 
good grief. it may be rather fragmented.
or wordy. nooooo?

17 comments:

Janette said...

Yay!!! I'm glad your back.I love reading your blog. Heck If you wrote a book I'd love reading that too!! I'm glad it's getting better. I can totally relate how hard moving is. We our approaching our 3rd year in viva las Vegas and I can finally say I like it. Hang in here....st George is the bomb digity and I'm totally jealous!!!!!!!!!!

Chelsey said...

Oh Kristin, I read this and thought....wow, this sounds just like me. Change is so incredibly hard. I too have had a rough go this summer and long for the days of swimming at the pool with friends and lots of play dates. Our ward completely sucks here and I have zero friends, I mean zero. I am lonely and frustrated. This is my 4th time having to move and start over and frankly I am over it. I just wanna go back to my comfort zone. My point is that you are not alone, and I know I am not alone either. So many of us are going through this, and we all get through it. I guess its what we make of it. Its crappy if we make it crappy. I gotta work on making it better. Any who, let's catch up next time we come to stg.

Amelia Wilcox said...

We moved into an older neighborhood in millcreek about the same time you guys left for st. george. I totally identify with what you're going through and I've gone through a similar situation sadness. We knew it was right for us for a number of reasons, and it was time for us to move on, but I sometimes miss the magic of our life in daybreak. Thanks for writing this. I've always identified ruth your remarks in relief society and you've always helped me inadvertently. Thanks!

Lisa said...

Love you! I feel your pain in leaving so many people you love. Moving, while exciting and "right," just plain stinks at times! However, with that being said it seems a greater tragedy to have no sorrow in leaving, as that sadness is a reflection of all the amazing relationships we created! Hang in there sister, I have no doubt you will thrive, sometimes our hearts just need a little time to breathe :)

carrie said...

Ha ha, you are so great Kristin! I loved this post. Wish we could hang out, like, right now!

Lindsay said...

It is so good to hear form you. I'm totally weirded out when I knock on that purple door now.

I miss you.

I think it's great that your little Rockstar is in Kindergarten! I bet he loves it. :)

You're going to be okay girl. BIG HUGS!!! Love ya!

Tricia Lovato said...

I am so glad you are writing again. I have been so worried about you but didn't want to pry. I cannot tell you how much it helped me when you told me "Trish, you have to write the not so good moments too. When your blog book is printed you can look back on those moments and realize how far you have come." I doubt you realize how much those words helped me. I know not many people read my blog and really I don't care...it's a place for me to write how I feel and it helps me process things. Sometimes things that felt like horrible things seem a little easier after I write them down. You will get through this. You are so strong....I think much stronger than you realize! Change is so hard but it will get easier...it has to. Keep blogging....I have missed your writing so very much! I love reading your blog and guess what??? It's okay to be sad. It's okay to miss your house, daybreak, friends etc. It's ok to not want to blog. But know that there are lots of people out there that love you very much....I for one am one of them and I pray for your family often. I miss you more than you can possibly know. I vote for a girls trip to St. George...who's in? Love you girl!!!

Elise said...

Donkey Kong, the spiders, and the rockets. . . oh soooooo funny! I'm so glad we got to see you last week. It was so great to talk to you. I should have brought you some cookies or brownies for old times' sake. I'm such a dummy! Next time for sure! :) Great blog post.

Lacey said...

Yeah. Your back! I wondered how your move went. Being one who moves every so often, I feel for ya. It's hard....and kinda sucks trying to find a new groove with a new setting. I don't do change well. I have been here since June and I am just starting to come out of my hole.
I wish I could get my hands on your house. I bet the "bones" are awesome. Paint it a nice white or light grey. It will make a great difference. I'm obsessed with interior design. You do eBay I do websites about interior design.
Best of luck! Love reading your blog.

Lacey

Amy said...

Kristin! I am so glad to hear from you! I have missed you. Your writing is so fun to read. I'm sorry the transition has been hard. Wish we could hang out. Bust out some oils and see if they can help you! Maybe we can meet up soon.

Becky Hill said...

I for one am glad to see you back in the blogging world! Yours is my favorite to read. Sorry to hear you fam is having a hard time adjusting, i get a taste of what your going through every other summer, definitely hard. I'm sure you guys will be back in the swing of things before you know it. Who needs to leave the house or have a neighborhood full of kids when you have a backyard like yours, sounds amazing!Good luck with things. p.s. it was good to see you at T.J. Maxx. You and your little girl looked adorable as usual! Wish i could have talked to you more.

Ashley said...

I've been thinking a lot about you lately!! I miss you so much in young womens. It's just not the same without you here. Marthe said she got the go ahead for a little "temple trip" to St. George/sleepover at your place, so hopefully we can plan that soon and have something to look forward to?? I'm sorry you are having a hard time adjusting, but you will get there. It just takes time. But in the mean time, know that you are missed greatly!!!

Trent and Jen said...

Just a couple of comments...

Thanks for giving me something to do again when work is slow.

It's going to be really hard for me not to say "Is that a paper rocket in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" the next time I see you.

I've had some experience with your kids "brown stuff". Maybe I can be of some pottie training service the next time we're in town.

Say Hi to Fruit Stripes...I mean Big League Chew...I mean Bazooka...I can't remember what kind of gum he is.

Kristal said...

I felt that way when we moved to the village and then again when we moved to midvale. It has taken me about 7 months to adjust and finally feel a part of the ward. I hate change too. I'm really sorry about your grandma. I'm glad you got to see her and get a picture with her before she passed away. Life just sucks sometimes, but luckily we have the gospel. Hang in there chicka. Love ya!

debbie joy said...

I am soooo glad to see you are back on the Blog!!! even though we talk every day I get such a fix from reading your blog. I want to be the editor on your book when you write it just because it would be so much fun to be in on that project. I have missed your writing expressions. You are such an amazing wordster. I have also beemn worried as only a mom can be about your funk since moving. I can't wait to finally be down in stg for good so I can be more support. Know that you are so loved by so many. Every other day I would open your blog and be so anxious when I saw no new ones since Sept 2. She is watching you and so proud of who you are. So am I!!!! MOM

Ashlee said...

Love you love you love you!
Also, if I can help in any way... I'd love to :)

Dana said...

I'm sorry. Just think of it this way, you have a whole new neighborhood and ward to make love you...and they will very soon if they don't already. You get to bless lots more lives now with your fun personality and interesting opinions. I love being in an older ward because the women take care of me and treat my boys like grand kids. I think you will love it soon! If I lived there I would bring over this salsa that I am currently chowing on and we would eat the whole bottle. Love ya! You totally own change!